With 10 You Get Bedrolls, And Veggie Burgers

By Sheilah Zimpel

From the VRBO website: “Relax and enjoy your vacation at this great getaway in the mountains, located 15 minutes to the heart of Brevard, and Hendersonville, 10 minutes to Asheville Airport, 20 minutes to Asheville, 10 minutes to the entrance of Pisgah National Forest, you can't go wrong.
THIS IS THE PERFECT LOCATION FOR 3 MOUNTAIN CITIES !!!
From the upper level of the cottage, the view from a large deck is breath taking. Overlooking a 5 acre private fishing pond, with a view of the beautiful mountains of Pisgah National Forest in the background. Take a stroll across the pond in the paddle boat. Wet a hook and reel in your catch. The pond is stocked with bass & bream trout & catfish. (Catch and release, please)
From the lower level, relax on a long covered deck overlooking a small stocked pond with koy & bream. A comfortable sitting area for dining outside, porch swing & chairs are provided for your comfort.
This cottage is located 10 minutes from Pisgah National Forest where you have to see and enjoy Sliding Rock, Looking Glass Falls, the Blue Ridge Parkway and many more attractions. Spend your day horseback riding, hiking, floating the river, picnicing and more. Visit the Biltmore House in Asheville, the Brevard Music Center,the Flat Rock Playhouse in Hendersonville and much much more.”

It sounds so idyllic, doesn’t it? Add 8 to 10 adults, 3 kids, and enough pullout couches to cover every square foot of the place. Add a four-lane highway a stone’s throw away. Throw in a pond off the back deck that’s unfishable and a porch ceiling fan that sounds like a Chinook taking to the sky. Cook at 95 F for 4 nights and 5 days.

Instant *extended* family vacation. Feeds 10-20, or 2 vegetarians.

Saw some mountains while I was there, but not from our “cabin nestled at the edge of the Pisgah.” No, we had to drive in, which had easy access from the end of our diveway onto the much-travelled highway that went into the heart of Brevard. Became intimately familiar with the O.P. Taylor toy store.

Dave said Dylan and I wouldn’t last a day. But he underestimated his son’s desire to be with cousins, family, which we don’t get much of. We put him to shame by lasting all week, sleeping on a pullout-couch together. Ever sleep with a kid? Then you know. The first night we tried a fat blowup bed on top of the pullout, but somehow, I dunno -- too many monkeys jumping on the bed? -- it punctured, leaving Dylan nestled like a rock on a fluffy cloud, slowly deflating.

Dylan caught the first fish, dubbed miracle ones, for the broken rod & reel he used and the lack of bait. He counts fishing among the best parts of the vacation, and I was impressed with the kids’ ability to wait patiently for a bite. Only one kid fell in. His next favorite was the paddleboat, and watching the blue heron and geese and ducks and goslings take flight, land, and feed. An ace cornhole player, who happened to be a fast-pitch softball pitcher in high school, aptly dubbed Cornho Queen...you know, that game we called BEAN BAG TOSS in kindergarten in the '60s.

Big breakfasts, dinner made for you, playing Apples to Apples late (and seeing how closely your thoughts align with your brother, which was scary), Looking Glass Falls and Sliding Rock, and a nearby coffeehouse.

All in all, I’d say it was the typical family vacation—too many bodies, not enough space, too hot, too far, too long, too much—just like real families, only more so. Too many Moms, but not the one we missed. No privacy, no peace and quiet, dietary restrictions, late nights and early wakings, vegetarian nieces and too much meat. One threat of drowning and some fish you had to throw back, a pond you couldn’t swim in. Only one bite by a 4-year-old to an 8-year-old's back.

Did you know you can get nightmares from watching the Waltons? Dylan did—and that’s the perfect metaphor for this summer’s *family* vacation: too damn many people living on top of each other in the country can be a harrowing experience, but it’s family, so we're grateful for it anyway.

Shut up, John Boy.

Sometimes Momma’s Gotta Do, What Momma’s Gotta Do.

Budgets, don’t you hate them? Those pesky little things get in the way of all the things we want, and in these trying times, sometimes the very things we need to stay afloat. I’m a stay-at-home mom and I work within a budget every single month. I don’t go over simply because I know that if I do, I put my family at risk.  That’s why the situation with Congress and the House butting heads over the debt ceiling in the last several weeks has me shaking with disgust. I don’t get it. I don’t understand it, and I thank heavens I don’t.  It’s really simple math, after all.

Think of it this way, the Federal Government’s budget is sort of run like this: You are a household earning $58,000.00 a year and you spend $75,000.00 and have around $327,000.00 in credit card debt.  It’s time to pony up and instead of rolling up your sleeves and getting down to business, you’re too busy arguing which one is smarter, has the better plan and who got the household into this mess in the first place while the deadline to do something is only days away. Makes a lot of sense, doesn’t it? Then, when you find your credit rating is downgraded, you cry foul and start pointing fingers. Oh please, grow up already.

Imagine how tickled I was when I saw that a lady had pulled money from her own budget  to purchase a banner to fly behind an airplane on Wednesday saying: “Thanks for the downgrade. You should all be fired.” Lucy Nobbe, a vice president at a private equities and investment firm, took the bull by the horns and waved her own flag. Because of the no fly zone over Washington, DC, she had the plane fly over Wall Street. When asked why she did it she said, “I’m just a mother from St. Louis who feels the only reason we got downgraded was people in politics.” Yep, there ya go. Mrs. Nobbe works in investments, but she said she was a Mom. Makes sense to me. Most of the moms I know can budget within the penny and can make the money go a long way, primarily because our children’s needs come first. Too bad the Congress and House don’t seem to realize that they were elected to put their country’s needs first.

I don’t care if they’re Republican, Democrat, Libertarian, Librarian, or Tab versus Fresca. Come down off of the “my way or no way” horse and start working together. The way they go on I wouldn’t trust them with my own household budget.  Besides, you know the old saying...“If Momma ain’t happy, nobody is happy.”

They Can’t Rewrite History, Can They?

In 1857 women didn’t have many options. They couldn’t vote, they couldn’t own property, and you hardly, if ever, heard of a woman having an education that went further than finishing school. The best most women could hope for was to marry well. Then one day in 1857, a far-sighted gentleman decided to give ten thousand dollars and eight acres of land for the education of women. For 154 years Peace College in Raleigh, North Carolina, has been doing just that, educating women, until an announcement was made on July 21 that the school was going to become coeducational and the name would change to William Peace University.

Since the announcement, debate and controversy have ensued, but not for the reason some might think. While Peace is a private college, the board of trustees and the president are not required to discuss or review proposed changes with the student body, the alumnae, or even the faculty, so the announcement was made without prior knowledge to anyone, save the board and the current president. In fact, as early as January of this year, the board had announced that going coed was not even on the table, let alone a name change. Oh yeah, then there is all the business about complete course studies being done away with and tenured professors being forced out. So I guess you could say that an entire community was sucker punched and expected not to exhale.

Critics came out of the woodwork, making statements about the women who protested the change. (Although most were protesting the way the change was brought about and announced.) The comments ranged from: “men haters, left wing feminists, these are the same types of women who complain about so called glass ceilings,” and, “just go get your husband’s wallet.” Holy 1950’s, Batman! What year are we living in? There was the one who wrote: “You wanted the Equal Rights Amendment, you got it, now suck it up.” (Now that’s just plain silly. Only 35 of the necessary 38 states have ratified the ERA. When three more states vote yes, only then would it be possible that the ERA could be the 28th amendment.) These critics missed the point entirely. The dissent has everything to do with a lack of communication and preserving the history and integrity of a place that many called home for a time. You wouldn’t change the name of your home would you? A rose by any other name would, quite simply, no longer be a rose.

You see, I attended Peace College and it holds more than special memories for me. When I went there it was a community of women who learned together and grew into womanhood together. When I wrote “A Journey of Peace” this month, it was to share my history. Mine is just one little story out of the many that found a place to become. But the great “they” have already decided to change the history that I knew. On the college website they have reworked Peace’s history. Where it used to say “Peace College has a long tradition of providing education to women,” it now says “Peace has a long tradition of providing education.” Gone is the initial statement that once said William Peace provided the land and money for the continued education of women. The final sentence of that web page used to say “Peace College enjoys a reputation of providing women a unique environment…” and now says: “Today Peace College enjoys a reputation of providing a unique environment.” I used to love history; I just didn’t realize it could be so easily rewritten.

Can We Have A Civil Discussion, Please?

Is it just me or do you avoid the comments section of any news article, because you are horrified at what you might see? It's not that I'm not completely open to the sharing of opinions. I mean, c'mon, I'm married, I have elderly parents, I have teenagers...I get opinions and corrections thrown at me at a dizzying speed. But really, who are these people who feel the need to share with us their venom or disdain?


Our older son has ADHD. It is impossible to read an article about it without finding out that it doesn't exist, it's just an excuse for poor parenting, I am the world's worst parent and it's all my fault. Hey, I have teenagers - they can tell me that. All I need is Tom Cruise yelling at me over the psychiatric profession to make the mood complete. I was hoping to see techniques, books, or websites that other parents recommend. No hope for that in the midst of the blame game.


Another example - I attended East Carolina University. Try to read any article about one of our sports teams and the other schools fans will show up spewing venom about my school. Just as an aside, if you are going to demean the reputation of an educational institution, it usually works best if you SOUND EDUCATED. And for goodness sake, avoid all political articles comment sections unless you want to see true and complete inability to listen to another's opinion. All of the recent debt ceiling discussions have resulted in people everywhere sharing their opinions and ideas, but so often it's done with such anger or superiority that you can't bear to read their ideas or suggestions. 


Why have we become a society that is so incapable of listening to others in a well reasoned manner? What ever happened to civil discourse, to reasonable debate, to discussion? Can we please go back to "don't say it if you wouldn't say it to your mother"?

Blessings in the Debris

Ever had one of those days? I know, you know what I mean - the one where every time you turn around something breaks or something goes wrong? Since last Thursday I've had "one of those days" every single day. I've had internet connectivity issues which have resulted in numerous calls between me and the friendly automated system which suggests that most connection problems can be resolved by looking at their ONLINE help (with me often replying back to it in a most sarcastic manner), the dryer died in the midst of two loads of clothes, the parents had some messed up medical bills (calling a doctors billing office is almost as much fun as calling your internet service provider though at least they are usually in the United States as they imply you are stupid), every day has been a new adventure accompanied by the rolling eyes of teenagers. It's been fun.

And yet, how incredibly lucky I am - I still have both my parents and Momma could outrun me. I spent Saturday with several friends, and got my picture taken with a hot Pirate. The internet is a blessing when it comes to handling things for my parents, and I will have it all resolved before much longer (I only have two remaining issues, and those items belong to the teens. And I may need to leave them unconnected for a while longer since they aren't acting like I'm dumber than dirt as long as they know I'm their only hope. Just call me Obi Wan.) A friend pointed me in the direction of a reliable repairman and he's already come out to work on my dryer, and really aren't those and the microwave such wonderful inventions?

Now, honestly, I'm not always the best at counting my blessings the way I should. I love a good whine just as much as the next woman. But I read the book, "Unbroken" recently and it reminded me of the incredible sacrifices so many make for so many of us. I took our older son today to register for high school. I'm still not sure how that happened so fast, but it's here and he will be giving Air Force Jr. ROTC a try. Yep, I'm a little proud of that even if he decides it's not for him. It's more important to me that he not dismiss others and that he understand respect, duty, and honor. In the midst of all the debris from a too blessed life, I was at my parents for a couple of days. Daddy's slide downwards continues as was evidenced by his question to me, "What time is kickoff?" If I'm in town than we must be going to an ECU football game ready to cheer. He focuses on his time in Korea during the Korean War probably because it was a defining time for him where he showed the character to stand and do. I wrote Duty, Honor, Country because each day I hope and pray that I am teaching my teens through their rolling eyes and disdain to have respect, courage, and do their duty. And aren't we all so very blessed that we can?