Government Shutdown...Do You Really Wanna See My Granny's Frying Pan?

                  
                  Update - So obviously the government managed to come together in time. But I still think they need a Southern granny 'cause they sure do take an awful lot of time to do their chores.

               So the US government is in danger of shutting down, huh? And yet, I mailed those pesky estimated tax payments just this morning. Because while the government may be able to have “issues”, us dang taxpayers, well, we just keep paying or else. Anybody besides me find the whole thing so irritating that it makes your family seem sainted in comparison? I mean, c’mon, there are thousands of families out there who have managed to work on their “issues” without dragging the innocent into it. Maybe what the gubmint needs is a doggone Southern granny dragging y’all by the ear and tellin’ y’all to work it out or she’ll take the frying pan to your noggins!

                    I’m also wondering if this separation means when you come back to us, you’ll have worked on your “issues” and be ready to do your share of the housework? See just about every one of us has some story about you, and most of them would embarrass your grannies.

                    Let me share one that is particularly pertinent at tax season. We realized that Daddy was declining mentally when we got a notice from the IRS. It seems that Daddy had done his taxes incorrectly that year. The IRS in its good graces had redone them. Only problem was that they made it worse. I sat down and redid his taxes, filling out all the correct paperwork and notifying them in the required timely manner that we were disputing. That’s when the government threatened a lien on my elderly parents for the god awful amount of $77 that they were so sure my parents owed. Another flurry of phone calls, and they paused the process, bless their hearts. Finally we receive a check – for the $1800 that the government really owed my parents. Never did get an apology or an oopsies from them.

                    So if you shut down, how about attending therapy while we are separated? You can work on your “issues” and learn certain kindergarten rules like sharing and playing well together. Just don’t bill me for the therapy…because I can guarandamtee you that I will dispute it…or bring my frying pan to DC.

Taxes, Taxes, Taxes, and in Other News...Taxes

Who said the following?

A - “When there is an income tax, the just man will pay more and the unjust man less on the same amount of income.”

B - “If you get up early, work late, and pay your taxes you will get ahead – if you strike oil.”

C – “The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.”

Sort of unfair to start a blog entry about taxes with a pop quiz, isn’t it? After all you already have enough work to do.

So this year we all have until April 18 to file our federal taxes. Many states fell in line with that though you should really check whether that is the case for your state. I wrote about taxes in my Goodness Gracious column this month (The Tax Man Cometh) because I have been doing tax returns in some form since I was a little girl. Seriously. My Daddy worked for the Department of Revenue and he did tax returns for several friends from our home. My brothers and I love to discuss how we would have to line up the return just so in the typewriter with carbon paper (that dates us, doesn’t it?) and type up the returns so he could present them to his client. He would be at the other end of the table furiously working the adding machine while Momma complained over the use of her beautiful dining room table. When I hit college I took over a few of his clients for the extra money (any way to earn a buck, well, except for stripping). So in our household, hubby just asks me when they are done and what the outcome is (I should point out the man has an MBA in Finance so he could do them…if he wanted to…which he does not.) I’ve included a few more favorite quotes about taxes and I think the authors will surprise you and maybe some will make you laugh. So share any stories about taxes and the frustration about the system. Who does them in your household? Are they done early or late? Do you use a tax software program? Any helpful hints?

Oh, and the answers are:

A – Plato (No kidding! The Parthenon must have been built with tax money.)

B – J. Paul Getty (of Standard Oil fame)

C – Albert Einstein (Doesn’t this quote and the one in my column make you feel better about the whole thing? I mean really – Einstein had issues!)